2016 Report Card

A to Pokémon Go: Not only has the viral app encouraged people to actually get off the couch and go outside, but you get to catch some super cute Pokémon and have eternal bragging rights if you’ve caught a Pikachu.

A to memes: From Joe Biden to Chewbacca Mom, 2016 has been the year of memes, and it came at an excellent time with all the drama and tragedy this year has given us.

A to the Cubs winning the World Series: Breaking a legendary losing streak all the way back to 1908, the Chicago Cubs have finally brought back another World Series pennant to the Windy City, and it was celebrated nationwide whether you’re a Chicago fan or not.

A to the Gilmore Girls revival: Everyone’s favorite highly-caffeinated, mother-daughter duo returned for a four episode special on Netflix and it was just like the originals, and totally worth staying up all night watching.

A to the pep rally: LHS may be the only high school in America to not have rigged pep rallies, and the class of ‘18 winning this fall has not only given hope to all underclassmen, but has also shown that just because you’re older doesn’t mean you always win 😉

A to new emojis: Eye-rolling, black hearts, and so many realistic looking foods are just some of the newest additions to the emoji keyboard. Now there are so many new ways to express our feelings about 2016 without typing any words!

A to the Summer Olympics: Michael Phelps, Simone Biles, and Lilly King are just a few of the U.S. Olympians who brought home gold medals this summer from Rio. Overall, 2016 was a solid year for our athletes.

A to Laurie Hernandez: At least 2016 was a good year for someone! This U.S. Olympian gymnast won gold in the Summer Olympics and the giant disco ball for this season of Dancing With the Stars!

C to finstas: What’s the point of making a “fake Instagram” if you’re just going to walk around and desperately plead for followers and ruin the point of it being fake?

F to the Brangelina breakup: Love is dead. There’s no hope for any of us. But no worries, 2016 didn’t take away our ice cream.

F to the man bun: JUST BECAUSE BRAD PITT CAN DO IT DOESN’T MEAN YOU CAN. Actually, not even Brad Pitt. #OutlawTheManBun2017

F to the Walking Dead premiere: Sure, some shows can slide with a death in the premiere, but TWO? Are you monsters? Did you turn into zombies after last season? Not that it would be the worst thing to happen this year.

F to “Ohhh what the fweek”: For a particular group of people at Ledyard, maybe use some real words every once in awhile? And not yell it as a response to everythingggg.

F to Daaaaamn Daniel: Back at it again with the white vans, and the overrated vines. Daniel, you were only funny the first time.

F to celebrity deaths: There’s really too many to name, but it seemed like every time you looked at the news this year there was another tragedy. Pssssst read the Colonel instead we’re much happier.

F to all three branches of government having Republican majority: (Not a political post) But for the first time in decades, our government is completely unbalanced which will most likely result in many changes in previous national policies and laws throughout the next few years, for the best or not.

F to the election: This year’s election basically tore our country apart in the process, with some of the most controversial candidates in history and the number of criminal acts claimed to be committed by both, there was no hope.

F to Harambe Jokes: Yes, a gorilla was killed under extreme circumstances and it was tragic, but the amount of disrespect being shown with the countless amount of jokes, memes, and presidential votes just shows what a low point we have reached.

F to the return of Crocs: When did Crocs suddenly make a comeback? Getting Crocs for Christmas was the biggest insult of 2015, but now 2007 has returned and we all need to have tacky rubber clogs? Really 2016? Really? I thought we were supposed to learn from our mistakes.

Megan Rosen, Associate Editor-in-Chief

Junior Megan Rosen is the Associate Editor-in-Chief of The Colonel. She is on the varsity tennis team at Ledyard, participates in PALESTRA, and enjoys playing volleyball and basketball. When she is not in school, you can often find her shopping or eating waffles and drinking smoothies.

 

4 thoughts on “2016 Report Card

  1. How is the world is “F to all three branches of government having Republican majority: (Not a political post)” not a political post? It is not only completely political but also very bias. And why an F I’m not saying give it an A but come on. it shows that people had a change of heart and wanted something different for a change than that of a majority of democratic control in the three branches.

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    1. Hello Caleb, the intention of the note of this not being a political post was to avoid any bias toward a political party. The F was not directed at the Republican party itself, and would have been given the same grade if the government was entirely Democratic, Independent, or any other party. The point of the F was to refer to how long it has been since every branch of government has had the same majority, and the type of risk that brings to current policies. The Colonel did not intend to offend you or your political beliefs and we respect all political views. Thank you for reading!

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