Lambert Strike

In reaction to the loss of Evan Lambert, the previous women’s chorus instructor, Ledyard’s largest choir has decided to go on strike right before the biggest concert of the year: POPS.

The new women’s chorus teacher, Rebecca Pacuk, 21, is fresh out of The Hart School of Music. Pacuk’s young age has made her a vulnerable target for the hundred teenage girls. Women’s choir misses their chair-throwing, stool-breaking and head-banging-on-cabinets instructor, and they plan on getting him back at the cost of June’s concert.

Freshman Jolie Suarez shares why the rebellion is occurring. “I think most of the students are rebelling against Ms. Pacuk because her college-kid rebelliousness is rubbing off on us and now we’ve all gone crazy, I’ll tell ya.”

Suarez also believes the students will win the strike and Ledyard Administration will be forced to get Lambert on the phone. “College kids break like wishbones,” she says.

Abby Hennessey, a senior in women’s chorus, predicts Pacuk will, “Go home, cry, and drown her troubles in mashed potatoes. She’s always talking about how much she loves mashed potatoes.”

When The Colonel contacted Pacuk to see how she feels about her student’s rebellion, she simply stated, “I plead the fifth,” a common tactic used while on trial to prevent self-incrimination.

Although she may be keeping her true feelings secret, Pacuk did reveal that she is planning to do something about the strike, with a little help. “The rebellion must be quelled. I am in conversations with a group of esteemed individuals including members of the state legislature and former picket-liners. They are advising me on my best course of action for the future,” she said. Pacuk also adds that any student caught in the act of rebellion in class will be given a detention immediately.

“Give the sopranos the melody back,” is what it will take to get Hennessey back in action. Since Pacuk is an alto, she is allowing them to have all the fun parts of the chorus’ songs.

Suarez’s request is a little bigger. “To end the strike, Ms. Pacuk is gonna have to give us the rest of the year off. The extra hour and a half of sleep would be a blessing. Seriously though, push school times back.”

However, if Pacuk is unable to meet the student’s requests, audience members will not miss out on a well-choreographed production of “Uptown Funk” and “Unwritten”.

“I’ve been rehearsing the choreography with my cats every night and I think we’re ready to take the act to the stage should the women’s choir girls prove they can’t handle the pressure,” Pacuk said.

Before the final performance list is printed, Pacuk plans to take her classes day by day and hopefully have a nice road ahead of her at Ledyard. “I don’t know how it will affect my future. Right now I’m worrying about making it through each day. They say that time’s supposed to heal you, but so far I haven’t done much healing.”

If Pacuk doesn’t act on the rebellion soon, she may be saying “Hello to the other side” sooner than she may think. The other side being the band room, of course.

Megan Rosen, Staff Writer

Sophomore Megan Rosen is a staff writer for the 2015-2016 Colonel. She is on the volleyball team.

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